Sports present unique and playful learning opportunities. They teach us about ourselves, our limits and goals, and how to interact with others in the face of collaboration and competition. But how do we separate the positive social and emotional benefits of engaging in sports from the social and emotional pressures they’re paired with? How do we support our children so that, regardless of everything else, they feel proud of their accomplishments and have the confidence to win or lose with grace and without threat to their concept of self?
Here are 4 tips for supporting children’s mental health in relation to sports.
1. Model emotional awareness and acceptance
As parents, our own emotions and reactions are often tied to our children. We want them to feel happy, and we fill with pride over their accomplishments. We can also feel angry or indignant when they’ve been hurt or when we think they’ve been treated unfairly. Regardless of the situation, our children pick up on how we react and respond when our emotions are elevated. When feelings intensify, practice your own self-regulation strategies for your child to see. Winning and losing are inevitable in sports. Kids will have good days where they play well and get along with teammates, and not so good days where they don’t play so well and experience social conflicts. Modeling acceptance of all sorts of scenarios helps children to develop perspective and separates their concept of self from any individual performance or moment on the field.
2. Create space for emotional expression
Children have different needs and abilities when it comes to expressing and communicating their emotions. Caregivers can create space for conversation by asking open, unbiased questions. It’s also okay to create space for reflection and to just be a quiet, supportive presence for your child. When our children are reticent about their emotional experiences, we can help them develop emotional expression skills by talking about our own emotions in open and accepting ways.
3. Value the effort
Sports teach us some really powerful lessons. They teach us how to focus and work hard to achieve our goals, which in turn builds self-esteem and confidence. They present us with physical and emotional challenges, which help build strength and perseverance. Focusing on the effort, rather than the outcome, can help children recognize that their value is not only derived from whether they win or lose.
4. Support social awareness and problem-solving
Playing youth sports comes with a lot of social upside and downside. Being on a team can connect a child with a supportive community of like-minded people. Identifying as a team member can also help children push themselves to get stronger, faster, and more skilled for the sake of their team’s success.
But what about when they don’t make the team? Or they don’t feel accepted or supported by their teammates? How do children learn to recognize and accept their own—and other people’s—mental and physical limits?
Talk with your child about what is happening socially in their sports and on their team. Discuss and problem-solving around different scenarios that have happened (or may happen) to help your child strengthen their awareness and build social and emotional skills.
Mightier for Mental Health
One of the best ways to build self-regulation skills in your little athlete is by practicing off the field so they’re prepared when challenges arise. That’s where Mightiercomes in! Mightier is a digital mental health tool that helps children practice calming skills while wearing a heart rate sensor and playing games. Over time, children internalize these skills and can readily apply them in any situation, including sports! Curious? Try Mightier today!
